$14.83

I just returned from Starbucks. Yes, I know, how cliche. But, I'll have you all know that I am the first person to "sell out." I am a poser, tried and true. But, that's not the reason I am writing today. I went to Starbucks to read Julie and Julia, by Julie Powell, and to get my daily fill of espresso. I don't know what it is but chocolate mixed with espresso is better than sex at its best (sorry Englishman, but that's mostly true). So, I walked the couple of blocks to my local Starbucks (which is all you need to walk in Chicago, there's a 'Bucks on every corner here, not unlike CVS, Walgreen's and Dunkin Doughnuts) and I decided to get an iced Grande Mocha, and it should go without saying that I purchased a chocolate chip cookie as well even though this drink contains enough chocolate to satisfy the regular chocoholic (but, I've built up a tolerance over the years). In plain English, an Iced Grande Mocha is just a medium-sized drink containing milk, espresso, fancy schmancy chocolate over ice, overpriced. I usually think iced drinks and frappachinos are for babies and prissy high maintenance women, but it's hot out there today and I am feeling especially high maintenance, so, get off my back. Anyway, my total was $5.25, which I had to balance my checkbook right then and there to make sure I could afford it. SWIPED the Visa and then sat down on one of the slightly used Grandfather chairs which contained what appeared to be a cigarette burn hole. Hmmm. How. Why?
I opened my J&J and then carefully eyed the other patrons. I like to creep on other people in coffee shops because generally, coffee shops are magnets for posers, creeps, addicts of all sorts, hippies and pseudo artists. I like to think that I fit into all of the categories, so I fit right in. One guy was on his laptop, another was on his laptop, other woman was closing her laptop and across the room, another man was YES, on his laptop, if you can fathom THAT possibility.
Why are so many people laptopping at coffee shops? I think it goes back to the type of people who frequent those establishments. Posers, creeps, addicts, hippies and artists.
Anyway, as I was secretly developing back stories to all of these Starbucks characters, I glanced down at the table and there was a receipt in front of man #2 on laptop. No biggie. Starbucks gives out receipts just like normal establishments and places of business. But, here's the weird part. The receipt for this man was for $14.83. I look around and he wasn't with anyone, but in front of him was several empty cups and dishes.
Here's the gist:
Man wakes up, says, "Man, I'm grumpy. I don't want to make food all day. I am also low on espresso drinks in my body. I also don't want to use the internet at my own house. I'm going to Starbucks. I'll feed my 12 cats (people like 'Bucks people always have 3-15 cats in their possession) and I'll be gone until dark."
Then, he goes to Starbucks and hangs around, eating multiple meals and drinks until dark.
I mean, he went to Starbucks, according to the receipt and ordered two to three meals, including multiple drinks totaling $14.83.
I mean, I was flipping out about my measly 5 dollar bill. Who spends 14 dollars on Starbucks? Insane.