Up next: dorm desk, Dollar General, College Big wig, and my library love.
Ok, it's my Sophomore year at State U and I decided to make a couple bucks (literally a COUPLE of bucks---anything that's funded by the government is cheap) by working a hall desk. Job description: guarding UPS packages with my 5 foot 2 inch body, swiping student I.D. cards in exchange for ping pong balls (our dorm was the proud owner of a ping pong table). FYI: Ping pong has many many followers. In my college experience, if I had any free time, I would be spending it sleeping or watching bad television, NOT playing ping pong. Who are these people who have all of this free time? Underachievers, I'd like to think. Maybe, they are writing all of their papers about the art of ping pong and their playing is really just extensive research. Maybe.
Let me tell you guys, working the hall desk was so easy. I only worked like 5 to 10 hours a week and I literally just sat at the desk (had a computer though). The manager of the hall desk (yeah, we needed a manager) scheduled workers to work the hall desk on the weekends too. We were trying to be as convenient as possible for the students. The manager and the Dorm Coordinator ran the desk, and encouraged the workers to be as professional and serious about the job on and off duty. So, when I worked the lonely Saturday night, I decided to opt-out of the professionalism and pop a movie into the computer or download Youtube videos. One time it was: The Princess Bride, another time I watched like three episodes of the Office. Another time I played Saturday Night Live videos. ALL WHILE ON COMPANY TIME. Booyah. Another crucial fact about this story is the fact that the computer would play the episodes/movies/videos for ALL to hear. Imagine hearing The Office's theme song radiate in the corridors of a Saturday night. Yeah, I did it. Just a suggestion, kiddos, if you got a computer and the willpower to undermine your boss's authority, DO IT. The best part of the desk job was catching up on all the latest games. I never had any gaming systems as a kid. I had heard of Sega and Playstation, but I had never had the privilege to own one, or play one. So, when they invented computer games....and then four years later I heard about it....and then another several years before I played one myself... I knew this was the distraction for me! But, being in college is a timesuck. All I do is read, sleep, eat and write papers. I love writing papers (and sometimes reading), but that left little time for computer games. Anyway, this hall desk enabled me to catch up on the new games at addictinggames.com. Excelente! I actually only played four or five games (I just wanted to be the best at those games that I could be).
One time, when I was playing those games, it had something to do with a car. The controls were Space Bar to jump, use the arrows to move left, right, accelerate, etc. I got so into the game....it controlled me. I was the car that I controlled. I moved left....right.....faster and faster. All I could think about was the open road. But, just as soon as I thought I was winning, Bam! I slammed into another car on this virtual road on the Internet. If I had not been possessed by the information super highway, I could have handled the situation as if I had been playing a game. Instead, I handled the situation as if this was my only path in life. This road was my only mission. I could succeed at this game, or lose my life. So, after I hit the car, I screamed out: SON OF A BITCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -------------just in time to look up and see a loyal dormitory guest, holding a student I.D. card with the most absurd expression on his face. Under his wide-rimmed glasses, his eyes looked watery, half-closed, squinting back at me. His mouth held tightly pressed teeth. He was scared and confused. And I was the cause of that. NO. The gaming cult caused that face. I am just a member of that cult.
Next post: Dollar General, big wig and Library.
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