Finals Week Tidbits

Finals Week is upon us college folks are here are just some tips from me to you.
1. In case you haven't noticed, there is a hierarchy of people here in college. Freshman have NO room to complain, no matter what they are taking. I don't want to hear about your problems. I did my part when I was a freshman by not complaining, so you should do the same.
2. Everyone is stressed out. I'll give you two: "I'm so stressed out"s before I cut you off. No more. Everyone is in the same boat unless you are one of those people who got lucky and finished their worksheets ahead of time and is now only in the way.
I hate those people. What are they still doing around? At least pretend for our sake that you are stressed, barely breathing and is contemplating suicide. That's the least you can do.
3. If you've showered, you don't need to complain. Finals week is all about studying, cramming, eating bad junk food, not showering or changing clothes.
4. If someone barks at you......let it slide. They're busy and you probably were asking a dumb question. (I've gotten snipped at on more than one occasion, so this may only apply to me and my dumb incessant questions.)
5. Drinking while studying is ok. I don't care what time it is. If the person next to you smells like beer or vodka.....give him/her the "I-get-that-nod."
6. It's best not to ask what someone has left before they can go home for the semester.
I am so tired of hearing the lists of things to do from everyone. I can't keep track of everyone's list as well as my own. At least put it in a blogpost for all to read (like me, of course *insert pretentious laugh).
7. If someone is crying, vomiting, making the worst face you've ever seen.....just move away from that person. Be a hero. A finals week hero. You might not get your name in the newspaper, but you have to do your part and step up to the plate. And by step up....I mean give that loony some space.
One time (yesterday), I walked into a campus computer area that is rarely used, and this girl had her face to the window and was on the phone. All I wanted to do was check my mail (I don't have the 'Net at home). So, I walked in....gave a "Sup Homie" to the girl and THEN.......
she TURNED AROUND.
As she turned around, phone in-hand, her face.....Well, it was not good.
It gave me a good startle and I took a step backwards. The room was dark, she was next to the window, a small flicker of light shone in....
All I saw was massacre. I'd like to call it the Massacre on 4th Floor.
As I peered into her bloodshot, greasy, soggy eyes.....I was scared. She was having a hard time and obviously talking to her parental unit or significant other about some problems but, the amount of smeared make-up face ratio was 9 to 1. NINE TO ONE, PEOPLE.
9:1.
Immediately, I said, "I'm gonna go..............uh, somewhere else."
Then she said, "Really? Are you sure?"
Then I said to the 9:1 face girl, "Ohhhhhh, yeahhhhhhhhhhh."