Technology

Does anyone own a piece of technology?
I do. I admit it. I own a piece of metal and wires and chips and whatever the hell goes into electronics. I like to think magic and spells goes into each piece. We'll never know.
In other news, I have NO IDEA how those things work. Muchas cosas en the United States. I blame Asia. Asians are always creating some top-of-the-line mechanical or electronic device that is teeny tiny and can slide out of my hand on its own accord (having nothing to do with my clumsiness).
You know how some people are phobic of certain events, material things, situations or ailments? For instance, some people are agoraphobic (afraid of spiders). Some people are germaphobic (afraid of germs). Some people are xenophobic (afraid of sexyhottness). Well, para mi, I am afraid of technology. I have, and probably always will be, afraid of technology.
Anytime anyone comes over and whips out their new gadget, I make myself scarce. I become like a 14 year old boy from the Bible belt at a sorority house. I start sweating, my palms itch, I have trouble swallowing, I can't think straight, my voice becomes coarse---all the usual ailments that come with phobias. I just gotta get out of there. Clearly, this is the normal response to technology.
The biggest problem is APPLE. The Mac/Apple company is always inventing some new, tiny, expensive, pretty and white machine to buy.
For one, I am like a bull in a china shop. I am a 5' 2" lumberjack on roller skates, who doesn't do lumberjack outdoorsy activities. As this lumberjack, I am going to DROP any small tiny thing that requires handheld attention. Secondly, white? Really. Could they pick a more dirt-attracting color? I am messy. At any point-in-time, I have ketchup on my hands and dirt on my palms. I understand some of their toys are black, or pink, whatever. But, mostly, they are white.

I am actually quite jealous of all of these new toys. But, I don't need them and I definitely can't afford them. I wouldn't know what to do with all of these new toys, except parade them around in a Ziploc bag, unused.
I'm sure that I deleted Itunes off of my computer a year or two ago. I am a Windows Media Player aficionado. No street rep there, but definite accessibility. All I am saying, PC USERS UNITE. Also, MP3 player users unite. Macs can have their cool club, we as PC users need to develop a club, that is all I'm sayin'.
Imagine what would go on at THOSE meetings.

Call to Order
Singing of PC song:
(Hail to thee, Oh dear P.C, Hail to thee Oh Hail. Ease and Honor you have brought us, Hail to Thee, Oh Hail).

New Business
Old Business
Discussion
Departure....including holding and praising and bowing of the personal computer of choice.